“Just in case you thought otherwise, you are so much more than what others think of you or how they treat you. You are so much more than what you own, what you do, how many friends you have, your relationship status, your clothes/appearance, and any other seemingly important factor. You are made of stars. Don’t let anyone or anything make you forget it.”
I wrote those words on a day when I needed to remind myself that I matter. And by that, I do not mean that I am merely matter; I am not merely an object that is taking up space on this planet. I am energy. I have consciousness. And I have feelings. Some may not see just how much I matter. They might treat me as if I don’t matter at all. They might pretend I matter to them while they see me as having some sort of benefit in their life, and then slowly reveal themselves as not really caring about me. They might only see me as mattering in one way or another. But despite that, I will still matter just as much as the universe matters, because I am the universe. Whatever the universe is, I am also, for I cannot be in it if I am not of it. And to those people who do not see just how much I matter, I still see how much they matter. For each one of us is here, right now, and all of our actions and words matter on some scale, even if it is the smallest of scales. Perhaps this is the butterfly effect, which involves our small actions having larger impacts than we can even imagine. Many people have had positive and negative impacts on me. When they choose to act a certain way towards me, I absorb their actions initially, but I can choose to let all of that energy live inside of me or I can squeeze it out. Slowly, but surely, I am beginning to learn how to squeeze it out. I am letting go of the negativity of others towards me, whether it is words or actions, because I do not want this negativity to live inside of me. I am not going to let myself record these events and play them over and over like a broken record. Yes, I have the ability to play a different record in my mind. And it may be hard to let go, but I believe it is possible, and so I am going out into the world and absorbing as much positive energy as I can. My actions which are striving towards positivity are in direct contrast with those who spread negativity. If I do not strive towards the positive, if I let the negativity of others internalize inside of me, I will only create more negativity. I will be defeating myself, and possibly bringing down others with me. For everything I do is connected to you, and vice versa. We are all one part of a whole. Our part is just as important as anyone else’s. I am just as important as a president. I am just as important as a celebrity. Status and titles do not define who I am or how important I am. The way I look doesn’t determine who I am. The energy I put out into the world is what matters. It’s hard to remember that when every day I see things telling me that I can only be defined by what I have, what I do, how I look, etc. This is all a distraction. It only has power over me if I let it have power over me. If I choose to define myself by what I have, then that is all I will let myself be. But I know that I am so much more than that. When I have lost something that I’ve chosen to define myself through, I’ve felt like I lost myself. I’ve felt empty. But that is not who I am and the deeper I look into who I am, I realize that I can never know who I am. I can, however, feel and trust my feelings that I am everything. I am the universe. I matter.